Ever since the Cubs won the series in 1908, they have gone on to do a lot of losing, especially in the postseason, even though they had 97 wins this year. We have diagnosed their losing with this disease, even though there are questions whether Ugueth Urbina is a licensed psychologist or not. And although not every patient always have all of the specific symptoms of the diseases, we sure know the Cubs have the problem of overconfidence. They just might need to take a chill pill.

Because they are out of the playoffs, all of the fine contributors of UUIB are listening to “A Dying Cubs Fan’s Last Request” by Steve Goodman once again.

Do they still play the blues in Chicago
When baseball season rolls around
When the snow melts away,
Do the Cubbies still play
In their ivy covered burial ground
When I was a boy they were my pride and joy
But now they only bring fatigue
To the home of the brave
The land of the free
And the doormat of the National League

Sorry North Side, maybe next year guys (Apparently, we post more about the Cubs than any other team in the Majors, weird).

See you later today.

(Godspeed, Bernie Mac.)

Oh, and this. That sucks.

(lol, David Duchovny)

2B/IF Adrian Cardenas
OF Matt Spencer
RP Josh Outman

Philly gets

SP Joe Blanton

A couple days ago, Oakland traded away their 5th starter Joe Blanton away to Philadelphia prospects 2B Adrian Cardenas, RP Josh Outman, and a throw in OF Matt Spencer.

In a couple years, if Joe Blanton stinks up the place in Philadelphia, this could be one of these trades that keeps us asking “why?” like Larry Andersen for Jeff Bagwell, among others. And there is very real chance that this could happen, because Joe Blanton is more of a flyball, and he could get lit up in that small park they have in Philadelphia. His home/road ERA splits are 4.63/5.73, and Oakland is a pitchers park as well. This could be a very bad trade for Philadelphia. But it could also be a good one, because Oakland’s defense hasn’t exactly been spectacular this year, and defensive ERA numbers suggest that the defense behind Blanton could be the problem, and with Utley, Rollins and others behind Blanton, his ERA might actually go down slightly. So it really depends on how Blanton will do, and the numbers are so variable, because some numbers predict he will do bad, and some predict he will be decent with the Phillies, which would justify this trade. The offense behind Blanton does not suggest much, for example, Eric Milton’s 2005 Reds season where he had the great offense behind him, but was completely awful, and we all know how good the Phillies offense is this year.

Also, let’s look who the Phillies gave up for Blanton. Although there are not that many players that the Phillies could have traded for, they gave up a can’t-miss prospect in Adrian Cardenas, hitting .310/.375/.447 in High-A, which also means current Oakland 2B Mark Ellis will be gone. Cardenas was going to be blocked by Chase Utley no matter what. They also gave up a pitcher with good HR/9 rates in Josh Outman, although he got moved to the bullpen after a mediocre 2007 where his HR/9 went up while starting, and the Phillies 2007 3rd Round draft pick Matt Spencer, who has not really done much in the pro level and is hitting .249 this year in High-A ball. Cardenas is the real gem here, and although he’s only in A-Ball and is as old as we are, he has hit well in every level thus far. He was the Gatorade state High School Player of the year in Florida in 2006, and he was teammates with Chris Marrero, who is in the Washington Nationals system right now, and was the the 15th overall pick in 2006. All Cardenas has done is hit (I think Cardenas will be in the Majors in 2-3 years, not 3-4 years like some are saying), and if he turns into something great, and if Outman turns into a decent pitcher (He needed a change in scenery after the Phillies moved him to the bullpen), then we all know who got the better end of the trade. Again, this could really be one of those trades where bored sportswriters could list as “one of the worst trades in the past 20 years,” but again, if Blanton turns into something slightly useful and the Phillies make the playoffs instead of running Adam Eaton out there every 5th day, it could also be a decent trade that works out for the Phillies. Really, it can go either way. I still think the Phillies may have given up too much.

Mike Hampton injury watch: Mike Hampton injured again

Apparently Mike Hampton tweaked his groin again during a rehab start. When will this end? Certainly one of the worst contracts in history. His arm felt fine though, apparently. It just sucks for Hampton, whose body keeps taking his baseball abilities as a league-average starter away from him, and ultimately, you have to feel bad for him. It’s still funny at his expense, with the frequency of his injuries.

Anyways, looks like Richie Sexson is signing with the Yankees, as they were looking for a power right handed bat in their bench. Since Sexson will be in the eternal slump he’s been in for all of 2008, he will definitely give Jason Giambi’s gold thong a lot of mileage, and hell, he might end up owning it by the end of the season.

By the way, this new Giambi picture with fellow Yankee player Jack Daniels from Deadspin is awesome.

My lineup will consist of:

2 Catchers
1 First Baseman
1 First Baseman/Third Baseman
1 Second Baseman
1 Second Baseman/Shortstop
1 Third Baseman
1 Shortstops
4 Outfielders
1 Utility Player
12 pitchers, 7 RP, 5 SP

Catcher: Brian McCann – Atlanta Braves

I made a mistake when I chose Russell Martin based on him dating Alyssa Milano on one of my older articles. Brian McCann is having the better season indeed.

Backup Catcher: Chris Coste – Philadelphia Phillies

He’s had more playing time, and has done well in splitting with Carlos Ruiz, especially with hitting, and definitely would help the clubhouse with his somewhat eccentric personality, you know, writing books and all that. I could also put Chris Ianetta of the Rockies here.

First Base: Lance Berkman – Houston Astros

Easily. Switch hitting, puts up MVP numbers every year, criminally underrated, and I wonder, will Berkman go to the Hall of Fame if he keeps putting up these types of numbers, year after year? Even if his body type doesn’t favor him (David Ortiz or Mo Vaughn like body that might break down easily when older), I would like to see him put up these MVP numbers.

Backup 1st Base/3rd Base: Jorge Cantu – Florida Marlins

This one is hard to find, due to the lack of third basemen playing first base as well, but Jorge Cantu certainly fits the bill, and what a great find for the Marlins.

Second Base: Chase Utley – Philadelphia Phillies

Chase Utley, great at everything, including chewing Skoal and stopping Global Warming. Can play at first and DH in the American League as well.

Shortstop: Hanley Ramirez – Florida Marlins

Unanimous choice in ESPN’s poll, and probably by everyone else too.

Util 2B/SS: Ryan Theriot – Chicago Cubs

I don’t know how much playing time he would get in this lineup, but he is indeed used as a 2B/SS, and also in the outfield, so he counts, and he would do good at singles hitting. I would also put Yunel Escobar here too. They are both pretty interchangeable.

Third Base: Chipper Jones – Atlanta Braves

Even though my selections for infield look exactly like the ESPN selections, he is having a career year, and his defense is slightly better than David Wright’s. If I was making this team a long-term one, I would choose Wright, but I’m not.

IF/OF: Jerry Hairston – Cincinnati Reds

There are a lot of guys in this mix, but Jerry Hairston is having a dandy of a season. Too bad he keeps getting injured.

Special mention/Hairston injury replacement: Edgar Gonzalez – San Diego Padres

Older brother of fellow teammate Adrian Gonzalez, he’s shown good batting ability, and can play anywhere. I wonder why he never had any Major League opportunity until now (even if this is small sample size here). Maybe not the best defensively, but neither is Hairston.

Left Field: Matt Holliday – Colorado Rockies

Another great season for him, and the least of the Rockies’ woes right now. Offensively, most of the best players are in left, so that counts out players like Pat Burrell, Jason Bay, Carlos Lee, and Ryan Braun.

Center Field: Nate McLouth – Pittsburgh Pirates

Yeah, Carlos Beltran is doing better than him slightly in CF, and is statistically the more complete package, but why not put McLouth here for breaking out, it’s more of an accomplishment, especially playing for the lowly Pirates.

Right Field: Ryan Ludwick – St. Louis Cardinals

It was either Ludwick or Corey Hart on this one. Both can field, and although Hart is slightly better at fielding (I don’t know about the range of Ludwick vs. Hart), Ludwick can get on base more, proving to be the more valuable player right now.

Fourth OF: Gabe Kapler – Milwaukee Brewers

There have been some good fourth outfielders this year, like Jayson Werth, John Bowker, and Skip Schumacher, but Gabe Kapler is hitting .315/.352/.517 from the bench, and doing pretty well for a player who took off a year for managing.

Starting Rotation

Ace: Brandon Webb – Arizona Diamondbacks

Would be the ace of this staff, due to his amazing start of the season.

#2: Tim Lincecum: San Francisco Giants

There’s something about the pitching of the NL West, maybe the pitching is just too damn good. Anyways, Lincecum is used as a #2 behind Matt Cain, so he counts as a #2 pitcher.

#3: Edinson Volquez: Cincinnati Reds

Technically the Reds’ #3 pitcher, and I would gladly put him there too since he is the best pitcher in baseball.

#4: Manny Parra – Milwaukee Brewers

He was #4 behind Bush, Sheets, and Suppan at the beginning of the year. It’s hard to define a #4 pitcher with this criteria, the downside. But Manny Parra would be another guy I would put on the actual All Star team. Plus, I need a lefty in the rotation.

#5: Eric Stults – LA Dodgers

Most #5 pitchers suck, so I had to pick the best one out of the crop, and even though he only has 5 starts, Eric Stults would be it. Seth McClung has been a pretty consistent #5 pitcher though, or if you want to go with players past their prime, Randy Johnson and Pedro Martinez. They’re still around? Stults is another lefty. With this rotation, I would put Parra ahead of Volquez and alternate lefty-righty-lefty.

Relief Pitching:

LRP: Buddy Carlyle – Atlanta Braves (has experience in starting too)
MRP: Heath Bell – San Diego Padres
MRP: Joe Biemel – Los Angeles Dodgers (Lefty)
MRP: Damaso Marte – Pittsburgh Pirates (Lefty) or Royce Ring – Atlanta Braves (Lefty)
MRP: Jared Burton – Cincinnati Reds

Since bullpens are used pretty liberally, this is the middle relief, and there are some setup guys here too since they also play at middle relief sometimes.

Setup: Jon Rauch – Washington Nationals

Because when Chad Cordero is back from injury in 2009, Jon Rauch isn’t the closer. Plus there aren’t any other Nationals in the lineup.

Closer: Kerry Wood – Chicago Cubs

Yeah, Kerry Wood sure is looking good at closer this year. Brad Lidge would be nice too.

This year’s Derby was, as usual, plagued with some things that need to stop.

• Berman’s “Back, back, back!” call. This works better in a game, when home runs aren’t happening every three pitches (unless Brett Myers is pitching).
• Hamilton’s drug history. It makes a good Oprah, but he appears to have his life in order now. Let’s focus on Josh Hamilton the MVP candidate.
• Terrible camera views. ESPN gave us some views I had never seen before and don’t want to see again. Keep the camera over the pitcher’s shoulder and stop slow mo-ing everything.
• Erin Andrews’ outfit. I sound like People Magazine here but she looked like the 1800s. Still way hot though and it was funny watching Josh Hamilton try to get in her pants.
• Players looking for face time. Edinson Volquez leaving the briefcase on the plate was not funny, and David Ortiz leaving was only funny because Yankee Stadium unleashed a giant boo upon him.
• That contest before the last round.

On the bright side, we did get to witness some history with Hamilton’s performance. Perhaps the coolest part of his Derby performance was him bringing his 71-year-old high school coach to pitch to him. He did a pretty good job too. Also, no one left a goose egg on the board like Jason Bay a couple years ago.

My team consists of

• 2 C
• 1 1B
• 1 1B/3B
• 1 2B
• 1 SS
• 1 3B
• 1 IF
• 5 OF
• 1 DH
• 5 SP
• 6 RP

Catchers

1. Joe Mauer-Minnesota Twins
2. Kelly Shoppach-Cleveland Indians

Mauer is having a great season for the always in contention Twins. He is 3rd in the AL with a .322 batting average and while the power numbers haven’t been there, he has been making up for it by getting on base (.417) and great defense. Kelly Shoppach is our backup catcher. He has split time behind the plate with the now injured Victor Martinez and is hitting .248 with 7 home runs.

First Base

1. Kevin Youkilis-Boston Red Sox
2. Sean Casey-Boston Red Sox

Youkilis is leading AL first basemen with a .927 OPS and plays exceptional defense at first base. In addition to his great play at first, he can also play on the other corner of the infield to get Sean Casey some action. Casey is batting .363/.410/.460 in 124 at bats. And he’s a great clubhouse presence.

Second Base

1. Ian Kinsler-Texas Rangers
2. Ramon Santiago-Detroit Tigers

Kinsler is having a huge year in every stat category. He is batting .333, has 14 home runs, and he has stolen 23 bases. He is Brian Roberts with power and Dustin Pedroia with speed. A nice combination indeed. Our backup at second is Saniago because he can play all the infield positions. He has been hurt this year, but in his limited action, he is batting .348 and contributes a sure glove.

Third Base

1. Alex Rodriguez-New York Yankees

Despite his penchant for dirty old women, Alex Rodriguez is still amazing. Even with his injury, he has still hit 19 home runs and is batting .313. Another typical great year for A-Rod.

Shortstop

1. MIchael Young-Texas Rangers

Shortstop is less productive this year in the AL but Young is still playing good baseball. Young has been scoring a lot, a byproduct of Texas’ explosive offense this season. Young has quietly been one of the best shortstops in baseball since 2003.

Outfield

1. Josh Hamilton-Texas Rangers
2. Grady Sizemore-Cleveland Indians
3. Jermaine Dye-Chicago White Sox
4. Marcus Thames-Detroit Tigers
5. Denard Span-Minnesota Twins

Hamilton is the most obvious choice of this bunch at .314/.369/.558 as he makes an MVP statement. Grady Sizemore is one of my favorite players even though he plays for the Cleveland Indians who I am not such a big fan of. He’s a very exciting defender but it’s his bat that’s making Grady’s Ladies moist. His 23 homers lead the American League. Jermaine Dye got snubbed in the All-Star voting this season. I guess people ignored his near .300 average and 20 home runs and the fact that he plays for a first place team. Thames would be my fourth outfielder because he is a dangerous power hitter. He has 17 home runs so far which softened the blow of losing Jacque Jones to a sudden lack of ability. My final guy in the outfield is Denard Span. He’s a speedster who has been getting playing time as of late in Minnesota. I like him, Gomez, and Delmon Young out there.

Designated Hitter

1. J.D. Drew-Boston Red Sox

He has been playing outfield but I am going to DH him. Leading the AL in OPS.

Starting Pitchers

1. Cliff Lee-Cleveland Indians
2. Justin Duchscherer-Oakland Athletics
3. Nick Blackburn-Minnesota Twins
   
4. Tim Wakefield-Boston Red Sox
5. Gavin Floyd-Chicago White Sox

I went by the depth charts on ESPN.com which orders guys in number of starts. So that determined the order. Lee is having a resurgence and making a case for Cy Young. Duchscherer has a WHIP of .87 which is incredible. A starter with a <1.00 WHIP is mind-blowing. Blackburn is giving the Twins some good outings with a 3.67 ERA. Wakefield is good to have because he could also do some relief for us if we ran into trouble. Gavin Floyd will round out our rotation. It hardly seems fair to have such a good #5 but we’ll say he’s a #5 because he’s still a youngun.

Bullpen

Closer-Francisco Rodriguez-Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim
Setup-Dan Wheeler-Tampa Bay Rays
Lefty Specialist-Hideki Okajima-Boston Red Sox
Unorthodox delivery-Chad Bradford-Baltimore Orioles
Mop up guy-R.A. Dickey-Seattle Mariners
Lifetime achievement-Kyle Farnsworth-New York Yankees

K-Rod has 37 saves already which puts him on pace for 63. Dan Wheeler has had a few hiccups lately, but he’s been good this year setting up. Okajima isn’t used strictly in a lefty role, but he could fill the spot or setup for Rodriguez. You need something weird in the bullepn so Chad Bradford will do. He has a mustache and a submarine delivery. And R.A. Dickey can float his knuckler around when we’re losing by 12. Kyle Farnsworth is also invited because throws fast and is unstable.